Hope Springs

Delusional eternal. Dear readers, I owe you an apology. I prematurely announced the demise of my barefoot/minimalist running life in this very space last week. No sooner had I done that than I caught wind that one of the leading voices in barefoot running, Jason Robillard would be leading a "bareform" running clinic tomorrow, March 1st in the very city of Portland! More exciting news has not been delivered in the past seven days. I made sure my schedule was open and made my plans to attend. I admit to being more than a little giddy at the prospect of getting real instruction and feedback about my running form. Now, I'm not one that's much for gurus or putting all my eggs in one expert's basket. I think that there's lots to learn from your own experiences and knowing yourself and limits. To me, this just adds to my experiences and may just give me some insight into why I've been struggling with barefoot running. Plus, I'll be around other barefoot running types from the area which will be cool.

I'm well past the point of proclamations or even high hopes by now. All through this experience my goal has been to run with as little pain as possible for as long as possible. Apples to apples barefoot wins this contest. I was putting in more miles consistently at the end of summer than I am now (and in less discomfort). Sure, I got injured and that required some changes but I don't think the baby should have gone out with the bathwater. Right now adjusting to running in shoes is killing me. My hips and my shins are murdered right now. I feel like I'm getting burned in any direction I try to go so I may as well exhaust all my options before I completely flame out. Right?

Stay tuned; I'm sure something will click in one direction or the other soon and this annoyance will all be history. Or, i'll have a completely new opinion by Friday...

Boom!

Once again, readers, it is time to hit the restart button on something, blow it up and go back to the beginning.

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No surprise to most of you, I'm rebooting my approach to running. To recap: Last year I started running again after a long layoff; I decided to do it barefoot because I read it would help reduce my injury rate and risk. It didn't; by year's end I was pretty seriously injured and had to take a two month break from running.

So, now I'm starting over. With regard to shoes/barefoot/minimal weird footwear options i seem to have come full circle.  I have come to the conclusion that shoes, or lack thereof, do not dictate a risk of injury. Human stupidity and stubbornness DO greatly contribute to an increased risk of injury. I'll explain. I was pretty sure that barefoot running wasn't ideal for me sometime in October (before I got hurt) but I stuck with it because I had bought completely into the idea that it was "better for me." I did all the drills, exercises and visualizations to "get it;" I took it slow, like everyone said to. I never improved as a runner. Sure, I could suffer through a 5k but I couldn't walk normally after, regardless of the pace and care I took during the run. But, I kept pushing on because "barefoot is better; I just need to adapt to it (could insert a long rant here, but will save for later date)..." Stubbornness got me hurt. Had I been more flexible about shoes I would not have gotten hurt as I did. FACT. Several times I thought I should throw on shoes for a given run, but didn't, making it worse. 

My foot has improved mightily since I a.) took a break and rested and b.) gave myself permission to try out running shoes for a while. On the runs I've been doing in my comeback, my feet aren't the weak link; my lost fitness is. I hadn't built a ton of a base miles last year due to the slow build philosophy of barefoot running so I wasn't "cardio fit" yet. It didn't take much time off to lose that fitness. So I huff and puff through a mile and a half, while my legs and feet are all "wait?! that's it? let's go longer!" sure; I have aches and pains after a run, but guess what? they're no more debilitating than the stuff I had after my early barefoot runs. I am fully convinced that if I take a slow build approach this time around I will be able to run and stay healthy, longer.

After all, it's the carpenter, not the hammer that builds the house. Knowing how to manage the tools and materials I have is the key to success at this endeavor. No; I don't think barefoot running is bad and I do still think it's a great approach for a lot of people. I took a lot of good from my experience that will help me be a better runner for sure. it just isn't for me. And, this is all about me, right?

it's over

Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?!?!

I've tried, kids; really, I have. But it's true. The barefoot running thing is over. For me, anyway. It just doesn't make sense for me to keep pushing an issue that I a.) have no confidence in/for and b.) doesn't seem to provide me a benefit over the alternative. 

I know you care sooo much.

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Yeah. I've been forging a comeback; I can even run a mile and a half without passing out. WooHoo! It's truly amazing how quick your fitness drops off when you don't have a huge base to carry you through. I'm smack dab in the middle of the crappy part of coming back. The one where it all hurts and feels like I may die at any moment. It's awesome, though, because I can actually get out there and get at it. Go me.

I know, I know, barefoot buffoonery is why you click this blog when it says "new post" or whatever. I just can't bring it, though. I've tried two barefoot runs in my comeback, both of them less than a half-mile. Horrible. No, my barefoot friends, not horrible in the "oh, you just need to re-condition your feet" way. Also not "horrible" in the gleeful way my workout buddy/sadist friend describes the workouts he designs for us. Horrible as in I almost reinjured my foot and I ain't messin' with that crap any more way. 

you tell 'em Sam.
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A while back I posted about the way barefoot running requires a slow build up in order to ward off injury risk from the dreaded TMTS (Too Much Too Soon) and how I wondered if I applied the same approach to running in shoes, flippers, lunchboxes, whatever I would see similar benefits. I'm leaning even more towards "yes" in this philosophy, based on my current experience. I've been running in shoes, short distances and building very slowly. I think my body is adapting to what it needs to do in order to function happily in this arrangement. For me (which is all that matters, really) it is going to be the best approach. I want to run more, longer and, eventually, faster. This is how I plan to get that done:

yep. Totally went there.source 

I'll be building slowly and listening to the feedback my body gives me. This is one of the many positive things I learned from my barefoot running experience and it will serve me well as I build back up. I'll also be paying careful attention to my form and how I run. This, I think, is far more important than whatever I have or don't have on my feet. I've got drills and other things that I'll work on too. One thing that I've done that should help is that I've started boxing as a workout. This requires posture and foot movement that really closely mimics the running form I've been working on the past year, so muscle memory will be more easily maintained I think. I'm feeling confident and ready to move on, which is the biggest part of the equation.

pretty well sums it up.
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It couldn't be helped

I actually ran today. I know, right?! shocking. In case you haven't been reading this utterly compelling, ongoing saga, I hurt my foot. That meant I wasn't running. Which meant I I began to question my running philosophy and values.

Yes, I do realize how ridiculous that last sentence sounds.

Don't be ridicaloos. That's right; you've been Balki'd

Sure, the fact that I ran a mile today is only a big deal to me (well, and maybe my doctor; he probably wouldn't be... what's the word?...pleased. But whatever. His advice has been crap). In truth, I probably shouldn't have done it, but I just couldn't take it any more and, plus, I had to test it out and see how things go. Right? Right? I mean, you'd have done the same thing in my (figurative) shoes...

Which brings me to the question no one everyone is asking: Did you run it barefoot, dumbass?

Yeah. I like TV.

No. I didn't. I wore shoes. At first I was going to keep my shoe-status on the downlow while I recovered to avoid "i told you so's" on both sides of the shoes/barefoot argument. Then I remembered no one involved in that argument cares enough to read my blog. Phew! That's a lot of pressure off. I split the middle, in fact; I wore the minimal shoes (My New Balance MR10's, to be exact). Of course, none of the Mnmlst rnnng (it's so minimal they left out the vowels) community will claim the MR10 as "minimal," but whatever. I can feel the ground and the orientation of my footstrike in 'em so I'm counting it. 

Running today was awesome. It wasn't a fast mile, but I was out there less than 10 minutes (so I didn't run too long, in all reality). It felt like an accomplishment just to set my mind on the fact that I was going to run today and then stick to it. That has been my biggest fear; that I'd get lazy by not running and lose the motivation to get back at it. Today affirmed this not to be the case and for that I am proud of my ill-advised (probably) little run.

full circle...again

So yeah. I'm starting to think doctors know no more about what's wrong with me than I do (or anything I found on Google).

May as well get your opinion, too, Doc...

After about a week (I know! that may be a personal record for following orders) of diligently following the doctors recommendations (cushioned, running shoes all the time, orthotic and metatarsal cushion, no running) my foot began to feel.....

Worse.

Yep. worse. So, today I walked around the house all day barefoot and took the metatarsal pad torture device thing out of my nice flat, wide minimal running shoes and felt unrealistically (like so much better it seemed implausible) better. Seriously, the met pad was the worst. It felt like I had a pointy rock in my shoe at all times. I really think that another day or so of letting my foot be and it will be better. it's still sore in the spot where the met pad was poking me, like your foot would be if you had a piece of gravel stuck in your shoe for 5 days. 

Sure, they look all soft and fluffy. Liars.

I got myself all spun up in the lack of information about my injury and lost sight of the simplest truth: I stepped on a rock. It hurt. I didn't take enough time to rest it before running some more. It hurt more. The end. Barefoot running didn't do it (OK, well it kinda did. if I was wearing shoes I may not have hurt it as much), or make it worse. 

Will I run barefoot again? who knows? I still think it's a perfectly viable alternative and will not rule it out; my form and running enjoyment improved so much last year through barefoot running that I have a hard time dismissing it. Right now I'm taking it easy, still not running or doing any high impact exercise and will reassess in a couple more weeks. I'm tired of not running. That is for sure.

Giving the Boot the, erm...boot

OK, so that sounded better in my head, but whatever; after my podiatrist appointment I sat the boot down and had a long conversation with it. It went something like this:

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Now, it isn't all sunshine and roses; I'm not out of the woods yet, and a few other cliches to say...I'm still banged up. However, I do NOT have a stress fracture and podiatrists aren't evil naysayers bent on keeping me from running.

barefoot running, on the other hand...Well, that is likely off the table. Sure, barefoot running didn't cause me to break my foot or hobble me for life, but it compounds what I discovered were underlying issues. Yes issues, with an S. More than one. what issues? Glad you asked.

First, I have 'Morton's Toe.' You've all heard of it; it's the one where the second toe is longer than the first (Well, it's more about metatarsal length and a disproportionately longer second...yeah. longer second toe works juuust fine). This drives to the second issue, where my second metatarsal sits lower in my foot than the others. Considerably lower. As in, if my foot were one of those cool British doubledecker buses, they would be on different decks. This makes my second metatarsal bear the brunt of my running. Add a forefoot-first running stride, take away the cushioning of, well, anything, and you have a recipe for metatarsalgia (fancy medical term for "the ball of my foot really hurts, man.").

no, I'm not flipping you off..I just happen to have a long birdie toe...

I never make absolute proclamations (Yes, I realize I just did...), but it seems unlikely that barefoot running is in the cards for me. I'm one of the people Jason Robillard was talking about when he said bfr may not be for everyone after all (and there's nothing wrong with that...). Actually, I don't know his specific thoughts on a case like mine, but an exceedingly vulnerable bone structure seems like a valid case for some manner of protection...

Anyway. For now I'm not running, barefoot or otherwise. I still have some healing to do. When the healing time passes I'm not certain what I'll do; but, I am pretty sure it will involve shoes and very close, careful attention to proper running form.

As the title says..Restart, rinse repeat, no?

The Dark Boot Rises

nice, right?

First, to answer the question you're all wondering: Yes, this was absolutely a barefoot running related injury. This would not have happened if I was wearing shoes.

As far as I can tell, this actually happened October 23rd in the Run LikeHell 5K. I distinctly recall coming down too hard on a sharp rock (either a loose piece of gravel or the horrendous Naito Parkway paving), leaving a bruise right under the 2nd metatarsal on my right foot. I went to the doctor. Twice. And neither time did they suspect more than a deep bruise. I was told to take it easy, that I could still run (first one said as is, second recommended a more cushioned, supportive shoe), and to just cut back on mileage. Did all that, and it never got better.

so this week I called the HMO and pushed for an appointment for another opinion. New doc was great and immediately decided to treat for stress fracture despite the fact that the x-ray didn't show anything (Stress fractures often don't show in x-rays). He was dismayed no one else had put me in a boot and got a little concerned at that point. So I got the boot and bonus crutches, with orders to put no weight on the foot. Awesome. I also got a referral to podiatry (they're going to LOVE the barefoot running bit) to further investigate the injury and determine if it's a stress fracture or something else. As it stands I'm in the boot for six weeks at least, and crutches until I get into Podiatry (at a minimum).

I'm so excited I can hardly stand. Ha. I crack myself up.

Chill, bro. I'll give your boot back when I'm done